Sometimes my heart knows the words I need before I can speak them. Sometimes my heart feels the hurts and the brokenness before I realize them. Sometimes my heart yearns for a hope I can barely understand let alone express. In those times, I let my heart speak. I let it whisper prayers for healing and for truth.
And for grace. Enough for today.
Enough for today.
Today, I claim the grace I need for yesterday’s words spoken in anger to my children and to myself. I claim the grace I need for the missed steps, for the choices I made that didn’t honor you, Jesus, and for the bitterness I clung to rather than release in favor of you and your truth.
Today, in this moment, I confess that I need grace more than I can bear. I need your grace, Jesus, and your mercy. Because some days are rough and raw and I am needy and weak. Because some days are ugly and you, Jesus, are beauty.
You, Jesus, are the beauty in my brokenness. You are the beauty and the grace that sustains me. You are the source of all that I yearn to be and to see in my world.
Today, Jesus, I claim the grace and the blood that wipes the slate clean and gives me a new start.
Today, Jesus, I step out of the boat and onto the water not just in faith, but in hope. And in expectation.
Today, Jesus. I give today to you. Every moment. Every thought. Every word. Every dream. Every hustle. Every desire. I lay them down, Lord. And I pick up your love, your grace.
Today, Jesus, I walk in love. I walk in grace. I walk in hope.
Today, Jesus, I look to you and seek your face and your truth, especially your truth about me, about who I am because of whose I am.
Today, Jesus, I refuse to accept the lies of the Enemy that worm their way into my brokenness, wanting me to believe that I am less than, that I do not count, that I do not matter, that I am not enough. Instead of his lies, Jesus, I stop here in my tracks and look to you. I look at you and there I see who I am. I see who you created me to be and who you daily call me to be.
No, I will not live out the lies that claw at me relentlessly.
No, I will not live out the picture the world paints for me.
No, I will not live out this idea that I am less than; I will not cut and run.
I will not give up.
I will not quit.
I will not give in to the chorus of voices that try desperately to drown out the voice of Truth.
No, I will pause and I will breathe and I will heed that still small voice that whispers on the wind that moves through the trees and is carried in the song of sparrow and projected in the shapes of the clouds and the shadows on the ground. In that beauty is the truth. In that symphony of creation is the essence of me.
Please, Jesus, hold me. Hold my heart, my dreams and my desires. Shape them, and conform them. Align them with your Truth and with the desires of your pure love, your pure Light. Take the promise of them and bear them with me so that I may walk in your Light with my eyes firmly locked on you and you alone.
Let your presence fill me as I seek your face today.