This verse has always resonated deeply with me. It still does, but in a different way.
For years I read this verse as God giving me the desires of my heart: what I desired, or, in other words, what I wanted. Selfish or at least self-centered or self-serving desires more often than not.
At times that included an easier way through struggles or a yearning for the wrong person or myriad requests too often centered on me and what I thought I needed. It’s not that they were bad; it’s that they were only good enough. In other words, they didn’t involve God or His best for me.
These days, I read the words of this psalm differently. I recognize the nuance of them and read them with the understanding that the desires of my heart are a gift from the One who loves me and who wants more for me than I can ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20). He wants to give me His best as I take delight in Him and in His Word.
Take delight in God, get to know Him intimately, and make Him the focus of my heart and mind and He will give me His best. He will hold out to me the desires He has for my heart so that my desires are really His desires. His desire and design for me to be the woman He created me to be when He knit me together in my mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13). His desire for me to do the good works He created for me to complete on this world (Ephesians 2:10).
And, so, today I find myself meditating on these words and seeking to take hold of God’s desires, God’s best, for my life.
Partly I am realizing that delighting in the Lord is an active process; one that involves complete surrender of my agenda as well as praying without ceasing. Delighting in the Lord is about obedience to the life He offers, the abundant life to which He calls me and that too often I forego.
How often to I mistake living for what is in reality merely surviving?
How often do I justify my choices, my sins, my mistakes and settle for so much less than God’s best?
How often does God pour out His grace and remind me that His mercies are new every morning.
And so I stand in the middle of my life and give thanks for the beauty as well as the brokenness and I choose to delight in the One who delights in me.