Like so many teenagers, sometimes our girls will disappear into their rooms and we won’t see them for a few hours. It can almost seem like we don’t have kids at all when they squirrel themselves away in their upstairs spaces. And, actually, with our youngest, there are times she will head outside and will get so caught up in what she’s doing, she’ll be out of sight for as much as two hours (even when the temperatures are more winter than summer!). One of the activities that lures them into these extended disappearing acts is writing, or writing-related projects.
Mind you, while the 14-year-old does do some traditional writing on a laptop, she also invests quite a lot of time and energy in developing original characters (or OCs) and weaving intricate storylines through storytelling rather than through traditional keyboard tapping on her computer. Because this is one of her favorite creative writing activities, we have invested in a series of small, reporter-style notebook sketchbooks where she can catalog her OCs. We opted for sketchbooks because she not only captures their names and sometimes their more intriguing character traits, she also tends to catch some OCs in sketches.
Unlike her sister, the 16-year-old tends toward traditional creative writing pursuits on her computer. She has explored some fascinating storylines involving time travel, 1980s rock stars, and teenage life as she sees it or wants it to be. Her latest creation, however, is more of a nonfiction inspired book based on some of her favorite dragon manuals and includes her original artwork as well as lore and characteristics of the included dragons (including their scientific names and subspecies) and spans 38 document pages. While I cannot say how much time she has dedicated to the writing portion, I know she has spent approximately 25 hours on the drawings in her iPad Procreate program.
Because we unschool, these projects exist. Because we are a bit freer in our approach to learning as unschooling homeschoolers, there is room in our day for each girl to spend time writing their stories, whatever that looks like. In other words, my youngest is more than welcome to use an oral storytelling approach as she weaves tales and uncovers new characters—their names, their traits, their desires, their role in the story world they inhabit. I can also accommodate her affinity for wandering areas outside, where her muse tends to meet her and inspire her.
Sometimes, homeschooling, and especially unschooling, can cause me to question whether we are doing enough, whether my girls are learning enough, or whether we should employ more structure or introduce additional curriculum into our days. But when those questions come, I like to take some time to consider what we actually do and separate that from what I sometimes think we are supposed to do. It can be too easy to fall prey to the idea there is only one way to do things, like homeschooling. But in my heart, I know that isn’t true; sometimes I have to turn off the noise of the outside world and its ideas and reconnect with why we unschool. Why I brought my girls home from their public charter school for what we often refer to as curiosity adventures.
Our list of reasons is long and varied, but at its heart it has everything to do with providing my teenagers with the opportunities to explore ideas and to uncover passions that matter to them. Perhaps it’s because I’ve never been much of a traditionally-focused person that providing an open-ended approach and creative space here at home feels best for our family. And so some days we spend more time with creative pursuits and other days we have appointments and hit a few basic parts, like history or real-life math.
Some days I will still wonder if I’m getting it right or if we’re doing enough. But on those days, I will also realize the deep quiet of the downstairs living space and smile, knowing my girls are involved in something that draws them in. Is that sometimes a YouTube video or Pinterest or a video game? Yes. But is that also sometimes something that feeds their heart and mind and soul? Also, yes. Is there room for those options as well as others? Absolutely. I love having a front row seat to watch these two amazing teenagers explore ideas and navigate the world in their own unique ways. Even more, I love that I have the opportunity to provide them the tools and the space they need to discover things that matter to them. It’s an adventure in all the write, and right, ways.